CE's Faith Journey

Sharing My Faith Journey with the World

  • All Work is God’s Work

    As I am re-reading Liturgy of the Ordinary, the forward message by Andy Crouch makes me stop because it addresses something that I have struggled with for so long: what is my purpose and what is my career plan?

    Since I was in high school, I have never had a clear path of what I wanted to achieve in life. In high school I didn’t know what I wanted to major in or what college I wanted to go to. Now that I am out of college and working professionally, I still don’t know what career I want. I feel like I am lost at sea with no north star to guide me.

    Over the last decade I have fallen into the nonprofit sector and I have really enjoyed it. I have found that over time I really enjoy serving and helping others and by working in a nonprofit everything I do is ultimately tied back to helping others.

    But the nonprofit sector comes with MANY downsides including a reputation for toxic work environments and non-livable wages. Even though I do love the nonprofit sector, my time has not been the easiest and it has made me continue to question what my purpose is and where should I invest my professional time.

    Many people I have shared my experience with have told me to leave the sector and go into the for profit space. But there is a strong pull keeping me in the nonprofit sector. I am a mission driven person, so to just go to any company and not really care about the goals and mission of a company is really hard for me.

    Is my struggle to not leave nonprofit work because that is my calling from God or just me wanting it to be my calling? Why is it so hard to hear and understand what God is saying….

    And then this quote from the forward of the book caught me:

    But there is also the more subtle quest for suitably “radical life”, a life of conspicuous sacrifice and service-a life that seems obviously set apart for something more than the mundane and (so we start to think) unimportant life. In this version of the ancient error, nonprofit work is more spiritual than for-profit work; urban neighborhoods are more spiritual than suburban ones; bicycles are more spiritual than minivans (Forward, 10).

    This quote hit me in the face with the reminder that I needed: ALL WORK IS GOD’S WORK. There is no one sector or job title that is more spiritual or holier than others. No matter what I do professionally, and where I do it, I can do it for Christ and spread his love to others. God needs people in every area of the world, and jobs, to spread his message.

    And the main thing is that I am living FOR CHRIST, not for my own personal goals and ambitions. I have been trying to figure everything out on my own and what I WANT. I need to put God first and everything else will follow; the job that I am doing will become a vessel for others to see God through me.

    Going forward I will take comfort that no matter where I am or what I am doing I can be glorifying God. It is NOT ME doing the amazing things, it is GOD using me that brings change and glory.

    This post is part of Finding God in Everyday Moments blog series.

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  • Finding God in Everyday Moments

    It is officially Christmas time! Not only are the holidays felt all around us, but churches all over are in Christmas overdrive!

    My church is in full Christmas mode and like every Christmas season, the following weeks the message will be focused on the reason of the season. This year, my church is focusing on the Holy Ordinary of the Christmas story. How seeming ordinary, small acts and events actually hold profound meaning.

    Though I love that Christ can be found in EVERYTHING, I most appreciate that he can be found in the ordinary. He doesn’t need all the glitz and glamour to be seen and experienced. It is through the small things that we can deeply connect with Christ. I love when the sun warms me up and I always imagine that God is giving me a big hug.

    Why is finding God in the ordinary important? To me, it is a reminder that we can simply just connect with God. We do not have to put on a huge production with many aspects and time-consuming practices to get closer to God. We can access and connect with him at any time! Through just praying anywhere, going on a walk or other simple things we can give him worship. He just wants us close, and he makes it easy to do. We humans are the ones who make it way more complicated.

    When this teaching series was first announced, I immediately thought of the book Liturgy of the Ordinary by Tish Harrison Warren. In this book, Warren shares how through ordinary things throughout the day can be used as acts of worship. I read this book 5 years ago and I want to revisit it this holiday season.

    So, for the following weeks leading up to Christmas, I will be sharing my thoughts and experiences of the ordinary as I follow the practice laid out in Liturgy of the Ordinary. I hope you follow along!

    And in the meantime, in the comments please share how you have experienced God in the most ordinary of ways!

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  • Thanksgiving Day Prayer for Those Hurting

    Dear Lord,

    I know I have so much to be thankful for and enough things to sing your praise for all of eternity.

    But today, my heart is heavy for those who are struggling today during Thanksgiving.

    I want to lift up those who are filled with sadness.

    Thank you that though you are the king of the universe, you know each of us personally. For those who are suffering you know their silent prayers and how much their hearts are heavy.

    Lord, please give peace to those suffering today; fill them with love and hope.

    Thank you for your unconditional love and your mercies that are renewed every day.

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  • Finding Faith in Financial Struggles

    I started this morning off when a letter that I would not be getting financial assistance to cover my medical bills.

    For the past few years I have received this assistance from the same company and it is critically needed: the shots that I need to get every week costs $1,000 each time and I work at a nonprofit, so I am barely getting by financially.

    To say this was a blow and upsetting was an understatement. I need this medicine but I can’t afford it. What am I to do?

    Though I don’t want to hear this news or deal with it, I think I needed it. For months now I have felt myself moving away from God. This has sent me crawling back to Him. One of the first thoughts I had after the initial shock of the news wore off was that I need to praise God and trust in Him through the good times AND the tough times. I can’t just lean on God and praise Him when it is convenient for me. My relationship with God is a constant thing and needs to be foster all the time. And I have NOT been doing that. This was a wake up call.

    Another sign was the verse of the day for today from Our Daily Verse: Hebrews 11:1: “Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see”. What is the coincidence that when I need to live by faith upon hearing tough news that the verse of the day email, one that I always get, has to do directly with my situation? I believe this is God speaking to me reminding me that I need to surrender to Him and have faith.

    I am still fully processing this situation but my first lesson is I am reminded that I need to actively work on my relationship with God always and to constantly surrender to Him- in the good times and the bad times.

    Here is to walking by faith.

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  • Embracing Divine Love This Valentine’s Day

    God,

    Today is Valentine’s Day and I want to take a moment to say that I love you.

    I know I don’t say it enough or ever. When thinking about love, I think about my family, friends and the lack of love I have in the romantic area. I am ashamed that I don’t focus on the most important love of my life: your love.

    Your love has transformed my life in ways that I can’t even begin to describe. Even though I am a sinner and continue to sin, you continue to love me and give me more mercy than I ever deserve.

    You have been with me through thick and thin. Even though I struggle to surrender total control to you and try to rely on my own strength, you show love towards me in these situations with your patience and your faithfulness. You never leave me and you carry me through my dark times.

    Thank you for loving the broken me. You don’t love me because I am perfect. You love me because of your goodness and I am your child. This confuses me so much! How can you love me? Help me not to question it, but rather, to surrender to your love.

    Going forward, I pray that I constantly reflect on your great love for me and all that you have done for me. May I also surrender to your love in order to be continuing transformed into a person who is an example of your love to others.

    Again Lord, thank you for your love for me and I love you forever.

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  • Hearing God’s Word in Jesus (How to Hear Jesus Weekly Reflections)

    “It is Christ himself, not the Bible, who is the true word of God” (C.S. Lewis)

    When you want to hear God where do you start? You start with Jesus.

    The book, How to Hear Jesus by Pete Greig, uses the story On the Road to Emmaus (Luke 24:13-35) as an illustration of how Jesus communicates with us. Jesus speaks in at least 5 different ways:

    • Conversationally
    • Exegetically (all the Scriptures concerning himself)
    • Sacra-mentally (took bread, gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them)
    • Prophetically (when their eyes were opened)
    • Inwardly (when He spoke directly to their heads, which were burning when He talked to them)

    It is important to know how Jesus communicates because our purpose is to have a true relationship with Jesus, ” to enjoy a real, conversational relationship with an infinitely loving divinity, which is why you almost certainly hear him already more than you realize” (Greig).

    But I know many, including myself, struggle to hear God. Why is that? The book highlights 3 areas which may hinder us from hearing Jesus:

    • Psychological- feeling unworthy of any kind of special attention from God.
    • Theological- questioning if God really speaks at all.
    • Experiential- being unfamiliar with the voice of God.

    This chapter gave me comfort in the reminder that Jesus speaks to everyone DIFFERENTLY. And it is true that different personality types may find it easier or harder to hear God. I know my personality type finds it hard to hear God! I find comfort knowing that I am not a lost cause- Jesus is speaking to me and I just need to find the way in which I hear Him best!

    Putting it Into Practice

    To put this chapter into practice, the book suggested listening more to worship music to draw nearer to Jesus. And that is is what I did! As I got ready in the morning and drove around in my car I was listening to worship music.

    I didn’t really listen to a wide variety of songs because a few songs really spoke to me and I listened to them on repeat for hours! Maybe this is one of the ways in which Jesus speaks to me? Here are the songs that I had on repeat:

    As I reflect back on these songs it is no wonder that they spoke to me. If I had to summarize my testimony and my relationship with God is the need to surrender. I came to Jesus when I was in 7th grade because I was struggling with changes in friends and growing up. I had almost every Bible verse highlighted about stress in high school as I was trying to achieve the most and afraid of failure. I am in constant need of reminding that I can’t do it alone, I need to surrender to God. This will be a lifelong journey for me.

    By listening to worship music throughout my day, it was a reminder of Jesus presence in my every day life. It was a constant reminder that Jesus is with me and a reminder of all the things He has done for me. I really felt like this exercise made me feel closer to Jesus.

    I encourage you this week to listen to more worship music and take a note on how it changes you in the next week. Share in the comments what songs speak most to you!

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  • Journey to Hearing God’s Voice: Weekly Reflections (based on How to Hear God by Pete Greig)

    I grew frustrated. I had been doing devotions through an app and every day it asked me how I heard God that day. What did I hear Him say? Each day I grew in defeat since my answer always was that I didn’t hear Him.

    Why wasn’t I hearing Him? Along with just hurrying through my devotions I also noticed that I didn’t know HOW to listen for God. Something needed to change.

    I remembered that around 2 years ago through a church book club I read How to Hear God by Pete Greig. Greig states that “learning to hear God’s voice is the most important task of a disciple of Jesus” and “hearing God’s voice is the key to everything”.

    I wanted and needed this type of relationship with God. But how do I hear God? Greig breaks it down to these ways of communication that God uses:

    • Hearing God’s Word in Jesus
    • Hearing God’s Word in the Bible
    • Hearing God’s Word in Prayer: Lectio Divina
    • Hearing God’s Word in Prophecy
    • Hearing God’s Whisper
    • Hearing God’s Whisper in Dreams and Unconscious
    • Hearing God’s Whisper in Community, Creation and Culture
    • The Word, the Whisper and the Way

    I have decided to re-read this book and put to practice listening to God through the recommendations of the book. And since I am sure others struggle with hearing God, I am going to share this journey! Each week I will post a recap of a chapter and how I practiced it in my life for the week. My hope is that by sharing my journey it will help others grow close to God and hear His voice as well.

    I can’t wait to see how much I grow closer to God through this journey!

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  • Why Christians Must Pursue Justice Today

    And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God”( Micah 6:8)

    When I was younger I would recite that verse once a week when I was part of G.E.M.S (Girls Everywhere Meeting the Savior). Looking back now, I realized how influential this verse was to me. The pillars of the verse have been threads throughout my life. 

    As I have developed I have realized that I have a strong sense of justice. I try to do the right thing and I feel really strongly in doing what is right. I have also taken a spiritual gift’s test and it has shown that one of my top gifts is mercy. I have a couple of examples of when people really wronged me, but for some reason I really can’t stay angry at them. I have chosen to move on.

    MLK Embodies Micah 6:8

    Today is MLK Day and I also can’t help but think of Martin Luther King when I think of this verse. He embodied this verse: 

    • His life work was devoted to seeking justice for marginalized groups reminding everyone that every individual is a child of God.
    •  Though violence was waged against him, MLK constantly preached a message of love and mercy. He called on people not to take up violent means but show mercy against those who persecuted them.
    • He used his gift as a preacher to lead the Civil Rights movement. His writings and speeches are filled with references to God and the kingdom. When things looked hopeless, he reminded the people in whom their hope and strength laid.

     Are You Seeking Justice & Mercy?

    Christians need a reminder that seeking justice and showing mercy to others is not only godly, but is EXPECTED of believers. I feel like too often Christians now focus on “superficial” things claiming this is what God truly wants us to focus on. The truth is, God wants us to focus on TRUE justice and mercy. What we need to remember is that:

    •   It was through the prophet Amos that God expressed His disappointment in Israel not caring for the poor and needy. And because the Israelites didn’t follow this command of God, and others, they were to be punished. “This is what the Lord says: For three sins of Israel, even for four, I will not relent. They sell the innocent for silver, and the needy for a pair of sandals. They trample on the heads of the poor as on the dust of the ground and deny justice to the oppressed.” (Amos 2:6-7)
    • Jesus rebuked the Pharisees for abandoning the true teaching of Christ.  “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you tithe mint and dill and cumin, and have neglected the weightier matters of the law: justice and mercy and faithfulness” (Matthew 23:23). 

    What to do Now?

    So, I encourage believers to let Martin Luther King Day serve as a reminder that not only is there work still to be done, but that this work is godly work.

    Here are some simple ways to start seeking justice and mercy in your own life:

    • Take a moment to reflect the role justice and mercy plays in your life. How do you view these two things?
    • Reflect on how you view and treat the needy of society today? In what ways can you improve?
    • Read the book of Amos (9 chapters) to see how important justice is to God.
    • What areas do you feel need the most improvement in terms of justice?
    • What are 3 simple things you can do today to improve justice and mercy in your life? Start small!
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  • Seeing God’s Power in Community (LA Fires)

    Seeing God’s Power in Community (LA Fires)

    As I watch the fires destroy LA my heart breaks and I feel so powerless to help. Through my church I was able to donate some items but I still felt like I was doing nothing.

    Until I saw all the items the church had collected from the community. It was inspiring to see people come together and help. And it served as a reminder that it’s not about me and it was never about my impact. It was all about God’s power through the community. It’s only through God that in less than 24 hours after the church asked for help, so many items were donated. The impact of God through His people is powerful.

    I share this as encouragement for those who are thinking about helping the victims of the LA fires. Whatever you can do will make a difference because God is at work and it will not go to waste.

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  • 2024: Testimony to God’s Faithfulness

    As I reflect back on 2024, I would say the theme of the year is a testimony to God’s faithfulness.

    For the past couple of years I have really been focusing on my mental health. During the pandemic I started to notice my anxiety and depression come back stronger. So I started the process of getting on new medication and starting therapy. And what a journey it took.

    It was a battle of two years trying to find the right medication and learning tools through therapy that would help me manage my anxiety and depression. To say that I struggled those two years would be an understatement. For two years I was struggling with what the future held and who I was as a person.

    But 2024 finally saw all the pieces coming together. It was the first time in two years my mental health was stable and I was able to really enjoy and live life!

    As I finish 2024, I can see God’s faithfulness. When I was questioning everything on my mental health journey, He listened and He heard me. He never left me and now I have the mental health I prayed for. I just had to trust in Him and wait-which we all know is easier said than done. And it was His strength that got me through those two difficult years.

    In the summer I made a decision to invest in my relationship with God again. I had been putting Him on the backburner for way too long. And as always, He proved His faithfulness by staying near me. He never gave up on me and knew that I would eventually come back home to Him.

    I am so grateful for 2024 and that God showed His faithfulness to me. I am excited to see what He has in store for me in 2025. I will work on trusting Him fully going into the future.

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